Articles/Blogs: Shari Johnson
http://www.washingtonblade.com/2012/05/10/change-of-heart/
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/shari-johnson/on-mothers-day-the-proud-_b_1512458.html
http://www.hrc.org/blog/entry/an-evangelical-moms-change-of-heart
http://www.johnselig.com/podcast/2012/07/11/episode-88-shari-johnson-evangel
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/shari-johnson/lgbt-discrimination_b_2871181.html
Shari Johnson's post on huffingtonpost.com June 20, 2013
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/shari-johnson/gay-pride-for-parents_b_3473526.html
Gay Pride for Parents
A phenomenon that occurs when one's progeny is so amazing that a parent feels compelled to tell everyone he or she knows about his or her child -- ad infinitum --, is something I call Parental Bragging Rights. For example, when I was a practicing dental hygienist I had a patient that I saw on a six-month schedule who would tell me, in minute detail, all that her only child, Charlotte, had accomplished since her last appointment. I often ran behind schedule as a result. However, one day she came in and was unusually quiet. I took advantage and got right to work, but it started to bother me. I thought perhaps something terrible had happened and it might help her to talk about it.
"How's Charlotte doing?"
"She's fine."
Okay, then -- back to work. It wasn't two minutes before she blurted out, "She got a tattoo and had her nose pierced!" If this distraught mother hadn't been close to tears, I would have laughed. Charlotte had done something that apparently was not on her mother's list of approved parental bragging rights.
Fast forward seven years when my 37-year-old daughter, who kept me amply supplied with reasons to brag on her -- Air Force Academy graduate, second woman to fly the U-2 spy plane, captain of a major airline -- called me one night and told me she is gay. The devastation was on the other foot now, and it wasn't so funny. As an evangelical Christian, I thought my world was ending -- this was the worst thing that could have happened. This wasn't about a tattoo or body piercings, this was something that, I thought at the time, would keep my daughter out of heaven.
I was obsessed with thinking about a tragedy that occurred when a woman in San Francisco was mauled to death by dogs in her apartment building. I live in West Texas, and people here were appalled over the news reports... until it was reported (for what reason I couldn't tell you), that she was a lesbian. Then the conversations went something like this:
"Did you hear about the woman in San Francisco who was killed by the dogs?"
"Yes, wasn't that horrible?"
"Well, I heard that she was a lesbian."
"Oh."
That "oh" spoke volumes. Translated, it said, "She wasn't really worth much, so it's not such a tragedy." I know this because as hard as it is for me to admit now, that thought flitted through my mind as well. I was not one who loved unconditionally. If you believed as I did, thought as I did, worshipped as I did and belonged to the same political party I did, I would love you -- maybe.
I became obsessed with the idea that people would think that about my daughter -- that her life wasn't worth anything.
I convinced myself that this was my only reason for not wanting anyone to know about her orientation. Surely, I was not so shallow as to make this about me -- but surely, I was. In April of this year, nearly eleven years after her call, I was preparing to speak at a Unitarian Universalist church in Lubbock, Texas, on the topic, "Love Your Neighbor and Love Your Enemies." (Yes, I've come a long way!) I realized with a jolt that my daughter's being gay had not been on the Evangelical Christian List of Approved Parental Bragging Rights.
During that telephone conversation in 2002, I told Cholene that I loved her and nothing would ever change that. I also told her that I wouldn't be marching in any gay parades. When she pressed me for what I thought about what she had told me I said, "It's wrong." I hurt her terribly that night, as that was the reason it had taken her to the age of 37 to tell me. It's a shame that life doesn't have an "undo" button.
I am now president of PFLAG (Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) in Odessa, Texas -- and when the time comes that we can march openly here, I will proudly be marching in that parade. As the parent of a remarkable woman, I have Gay Pride -- I am proud of the person she is; her compassion, her kindness to others, her integrity, the obstacles she has overcome, and the setbacks she has had to endure just for being who she is and was always meant to be. I am proud of my daughter -- not in spite of her being gay, but because she is gay.
"Dear Abby" published a letter in which PFLAG was offered as a resource.
07/12/2013
DEAR ABBY: I am a 30-year-old transgender woman who has just started her journey. Feeling more comfortable in my skin, I have been going to some local hangouts with some friends from work and meeting straight men. My question is, when is it appropriate to disclose that I am a preoperative trans woman?
I have tried online dating on trans-friendly websites, as well as visited the local transgender bar, but those men tend only to be looking for sex, and I am looking for more than that. I would love your advice on the matter. -- STARTING MY JOURNEY
DEAR STARTING: For your safety, it is important that you disclose your status early, before there is any sex involved. If you don't, the straight man could react violently and possibly put you in danger.
At this point, it would be a good idea to contact PFLAG (Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) because it can put you in touch with resources to help you through your journey. The largest increase in new individuals reaching out to PFLAG is now among people with "trans" issues -- and this includes both trans individuals and their family members.
It is critically important to seek out a culturally competent therapist to help you with specific issues. To find referrals and a local chapter, visitpflag.org.
http://community.pflag.org/dearabby
07/12/2013
DEAR ABBY: I am a 30-year-old transgender woman who has just started her journey. Feeling more comfortable in my skin, I have been going to some local hangouts with some friends from work and meeting straight men. My question is, when is it appropriate to disclose that I am a preoperative trans woman?
I have tried online dating on trans-friendly websites, as well as visited the local transgender bar, but those men tend only to be looking for sex, and I am looking for more than that. I would love your advice on the matter. -- STARTING MY JOURNEY
DEAR STARTING: For your safety, it is important that you disclose your status early, before there is any sex involved. If you don't, the straight man could react violently and possibly put you in danger.
At this point, it would be a good idea to contact PFLAG (Parents, Families and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) because it can put you in touch with resources to help you through your journey. The largest increase in new individuals reaching out to PFLAG is now among people with "trans" issues -- and this includes both trans individuals and their family members.
It is critically important to seek out a culturally competent therapist to help you with specific issues. To find referrals and a local chapter, visitpflag.org.
http://community.pflag.org/dearabby
Wednesday, June 26, 2013
GOOD-BYE DOMA AND PROPOSITION 8, HELLO MARRIAGE!
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: June 26, 2013
Liz Owen | [email protected]> | (202) 467-8180 ext. 214
GOOD-BYE DOMA AND PROPOSITION 8, HELLO MARRIAGE!
WASHINGTON – PFLAG National—the nation's largest organization for families, friends and allies of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) people – celebrated today’s victory at the United States Supreme Court, striking down both Section Three of the so-called Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) as unconstitutional, and Proposition 8 on standing, which means the restoration of marriage equality to the state of California.
“Today, committed and loving LGBT couples and their families, friends and allies in California and across the country celebrate a huge step forward towards full acceptance and equality,” said PFLAG National Executive Director Jody M. Huckaby. “The Supreme Court’s dual rulings affirm what we at PFLAG have always known to be true: that life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness are fundamental rights for all Americans, and that denial of those rights seriously harms LGBT people and their families.”
Joining in the celebration were PFLAG members and supporters from across the country who had worked tirelessly to ensure that their loved ones would receive equal treatment under the law.
Said PFLAG Los Angeles President Mariette Sawchuk, “When my son Stephen came out he said to me, ‘Mom, all I have ever wanted is to have a family and to have a marriage like yours and Dad’s.’ Thanks to today’s ruling, my twin sons--both of whom are gay--will have the opportunity to share in an enduring, loving, legally recognized and protected marriage.”
Sawchuk was one of several PFLAG members who shared personal stories in an Amicus Brief submitted by PFLAG to the Supreme Court regarding Proposition 8.
Another PFLAGer who participated in the brief was Eric Brock, whose older brother Brandon is gay. While Eric, Brandon, and each of their spouses celebrated today’s rulings, they acknowledged that there is still work to be done; Brandon and his spouse, Alexis Caloza, were married in New York and reside in San Francisco, where--thanks to today’s ruling--their marriage is now legal again. But Eric still resides in Arkansas where the brothers were born and raised, a state whose constitution bans same-sex marriage and civil unions.
Said the younger Brock, “I am incredibly excited that my brother's New York State marriage will be recognized by the Federal government and in the state of California where he now lives. This was a big step forward, but there is still a long way to go to reach full equality. We need to keep working so that If Brandon and Alexis should ever choose to return to Arkansas, the federal government would provide them all the benefits of marriage within that state...even if the state itself didn’t yet legally recognize their relationship.”
PFLAG National ED Huckaby agreed with Brock, stating, “PFLAG National and its vast chapter network will continue to move hearts and change minds to win full marriage equality at the federal level and in more states, and to grow support among the majority of Americans throughout the country. Together, we will continue to affirm the message that, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity, love is love, family is family, and marriage is marriage.”
###
About PFLAG NationalFounded in 1972 with the simple act of a mother publicly supporting her gay son, PFLAG is the original family and ally organization. Made up of parents, families, friends, and straight allies united with lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) people, PFLAG is committed to advancing equality through its mission of support, education and advocacy. PFLAG has more than 368 chapters and 200,000 supporters crossing multiple generations of American families in major urban centers, small cities, and rural areas in all 50 states. To learn more, please visit http://www.pflag.org, and connect with PFLAG National on Facebook and Twitter.
GOOD-BYE DOMA AND PROPOSITION 8, HELLO MARRIAGE!
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE: June 26, 2013
Liz Owen | [email protected]> | (202) 467-8180 ext. 214
GOOD-BYE DOMA AND PROPOSITION 8, HELLO MARRIAGE!
WASHINGTON – PFLAG National—the nation's largest organization for families, friends and allies of lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) people – celebrated today’s victory at the United States Supreme Court, striking down both Section Three of the so-called Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA) as unconstitutional, and Proposition 8 on standing, which means the restoration of marriage equality to the state of California.
“Today, committed and loving LGBT couples and their families, friends and allies in California and across the country celebrate a huge step forward towards full acceptance and equality,” said PFLAG National Executive Director Jody M. Huckaby. “The Supreme Court’s dual rulings affirm what we at PFLAG have always known to be true: that life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness are fundamental rights for all Americans, and that denial of those rights seriously harms LGBT people and their families.”
Joining in the celebration were PFLAG members and supporters from across the country who had worked tirelessly to ensure that their loved ones would receive equal treatment under the law.
Said PFLAG Los Angeles President Mariette Sawchuk, “When my son Stephen came out he said to me, ‘Mom, all I have ever wanted is to have a family and to have a marriage like yours and Dad’s.’ Thanks to today’s ruling, my twin sons--both of whom are gay--will have the opportunity to share in an enduring, loving, legally recognized and protected marriage.”
Sawchuk was one of several PFLAG members who shared personal stories in an Amicus Brief submitted by PFLAG to the Supreme Court regarding Proposition 8.
Another PFLAGer who participated in the brief was Eric Brock, whose older brother Brandon is gay. While Eric, Brandon, and each of their spouses celebrated today’s rulings, they acknowledged that there is still work to be done; Brandon and his spouse, Alexis Caloza, were married in New York and reside in San Francisco, where--thanks to today’s ruling--their marriage is now legal again. But Eric still resides in Arkansas where the brothers were born and raised, a state whose constitution bans same-sex marriage and civil unions.
Said the younger Brock, “I am incredibly excited that my brother's New York State marriage will be recognized by the Federal government and in the state of California where he now lives. This was a big step forward, but there is still a long way to go to reach full equality. We need to keep working so that If Brandon and Alexis should ever choose to return to Arkansas, the federal government would provide them all the benefits of marriage within that state...even if the state itself didn’t yet legally recognize their relationship.”
PFLAG National ED Huckaby agreed with Brock, stating, “PFLAG National and its vast chapter network will continue to move hearts and change minds to win full marriage equality at the federal level and in more states, and to grow support among the majority of Americans throughout the country. Together, we will continue to affirm the message that, regardless of sexual orientation or gender identity, love is love, family is family, and marriage is marriage.”
###
About PFLAG NationalFounded in 1972 with the simple act of a mother publicly supporting her gay son, PFLAG is the original family and ally organization. Made up of parents, families, friends, and straight allies united with lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender (LGBT) people, PFLAG is committed to advancing equality through its mission of support, education and advocacy. PFLAG has more than 368 chapters and 200,000 supporters crossing multiple generations of American families in major urban centers, small cities, and rural areas in all 50 states. To learn more, please visit http://www.pflag.org, and connect with PFLAG National on Facebook and Twitter.